Ryan, 41 years old

 On January 3rd 2022 6:05 pm  The hospital finally succeeded in murder for profit. It was this day, I lost my best friend of 25 years. We Met  at age 15 in a private Christian school. We knew right away our love was special and nothing was coming between us. I was with him 25 years ( over half my life ) married 13 wonderful years, and sadly separated at age 41 by evil greed, as healthcare paychecks were put above human life

We had to fight tooth and nail for Ryans legal right to try,  to try a script written for him by a doctor.   After a long battle, we were finally able to give him something many thought would help him .  After the first dose he began to make quick and steady improvements  after only 3 doses, 2 doctors decided to remove it from his care.  No transparency at all was given.  He was just cut off from something showing positive results.   It was a battle to get him back on.    Then after his body began to decline, once again he was removed the medication that was improving him, this time it was too much for his body to handle.   Ryan was dying.  I was losing my best friend, my reason for waking up each day and my joy in life.   25 years together being taken away in just a matter of hours.  We had vacation plans lined up and plans to see every US state at least once,  we had talks of getting a new house built together by summer.  We had big plans him and I.   He was only 41 years old and so much to live for.  He just started his business a year ago and it was just starting for him.  He was so proud of it and all he achieved.  He had so much to live for including me.  Ryan fought in the beginning to keep us together, and I had to go to bat and fight at the end.    After this last medication was restricted from him simply because “its not protocol”.  I watched my husbands body tire out in his long 40 plus day battle, that was sadly coming to a end, I played our wedding dance song “ me and you” in his hospital as i leaned over him stroking his hair, and apologizing for the corruption around us and how hard I tried to save him, telling him the battle is not over, that his death will not be in vain.   I told him “Ryan go home and be with Jesus now, where you can watch over me always and protect me in this next battle” .    All the while I’m thinking, how will i survive without him?  All our travel plans, all our big dreams gone!   My soulmate, my life long partner.  Why is this happening?  We are suppose to grow old together.  I’m suppose to go first so that I’m never left alone.    No one should have to beg and plead for proper health care in a hospital.  No ones human rights should be restricted once you walk through hospital doors.  We are living in scary times indeed.  We are being lied to as a society big time.    The best ( sarcasm ) was when a doctor came in his room and said to me “ i would love to give him this medication that may help him, heck i would give it to my own child if they were in his shoes, but sadly i have to think of my paycheck and livelihood first, my hands are tied due to politics “.    I told that doctor “ over Christmas while you’re with your family, i want you to have visions of me sitting here beside my livelihood sir, a woman beside all she owns begging a doctor to be a doctor and do the right thing and save her husband and i want you to remember what you just told me.  Many come into health care to save lives not make a paycheck but now i know what you stand for sir. May God forgive you “.       As my husbands heart beat slowed, and his blood pressure dropping rapidly.  I held his thumb.   Through life when i held his hand i always wrapped my small hands around his thumb, and in his death i was there holding on to his thumb again and told him how much he meant to me and that our love story was special.    The notebook movie always reminded each other of us and our story ( minus the wealthy parents ) and so i said to him one of my favorite lines …. “ it was real wasn’t it?  You and me, such a long time ago, just a couple of kids, but we really loved each other didn’t we?”     his heart rate came to a end and i fell on his chest and cried so hard.  I kept apologizing to him for everything he had to go through.     I promised him, his death will not be in vain.   I will speak out to teach others and I will hold others accountable.     Thank you for you donation in helping us with this uphill fight to not only give exposure but to fight this all the way we can and help us in our many expenses along the way .